Ah, Autumn.
Or Fall. Whichever you prefer to say based on your side of the pond. Anglophile you are if Autumn you use.
The warm days full of vibrant colors of reds, orange, yellows, and browns, and then of course those deep purples and pinks gloaming it up in the evenings. God totally has it lit either way! It’s more than enough for a Baptist to give a Pentecostal shout!
As I sit here in my cozy home office, God has blessed me with more than I could ever imagine. This location fully gives me not just a praying view of my neighborhood, but a front row seat to God’s changing of the seasons. This reminds me of Ecclesiastes 3 and Daniel 2:21a, but the current revealing transformation points me to Malachi 3:6, “For I the Lord do not change; therefore, you O children of Jacob, are not consumed.” Another one, Joshua 1:9, “Have not I commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
This last year and a half have been a full-on lesson in trusting my Lord while engaging the patience he has taught me. The trust wasn’t just limited to certain times, or seasons, but with everything involving this life I live. God turned upside down my employment and vehicle, which fully envelopes finances. Then church and small group, serving my Lord, evangelism, and how and where I fit in his ministry. All for God’s glory this is now pointed. Confused. Praying. Anxiety. Worship. Seeking. Weeping. Waiting. All the emotions overflowing.
Following my Lord has never been one of leisure yet it always is satisfying. Learning to rest in him and his decisions calms my anxiety and turns my weeping into worship while waiting on his choice for this life. After leaving the county jail in 2023, I was unemployed for several months at different times throughout the year with no help from the state within I reside. This is part of him teaching financial trust. A brief three-month stint at a job just wasn’t sticking in my head and so I chose to leave. This took a toll on my mental health as I thought I couldn’t learn new tricks. The other employment simply brought money in all the while reducing my reserve.
Seemed my Master had other ideas and knew that I could learn to trust in ways I never thought possible. From new full-time employment and relearning finances his way, to just how I see where he wants me to serve him. The ministry that he had selected for me using the gifts he gave, and talents learned, yet it was right underneath this old dog’s nose. All the while he never changed. Never failed. And most importantly he never left nor forsook me. Even during the process. Not once did he lose his temper, throw in the towel, and then walk away because I couldn’t grasp his teaching. No, he loved me through the process. He calmed me down, took me in his arms, and loved me deeper than anyone ever is able. Something I at the cusp of age fifty-six need.
It was as if he knelt down in front of me, wiping the tears from my eyes, and soothingly spoke directly to my heart Joshua 1:9. Then he held my hand as we started over again until it stuck inside my head and heart. All in preparation for this current year. He has gracefully opened my eyes to where he wants me to serve him. A place I could never imagine. Then he showed me how church and small group fits into my schedule. Worshipping him is now twenty-four seven fixating my eyes on him and his strength. My God is so good. All the time! Thus, he only deserves all the glory from, not just the last year and half, but my existence. I was not consumed. He is with me wheresoever I walk. I was not alone, and never am.
Making this weather all the sweeter. Happy Fall ya’ll!
“I shake, but my Rock moves not.” – Charles Spurgeon
Grace and peace, James
*Scripture from the ESV translation, Crossway, 2025